! BOYCOTT COCONUTS MUSIC !

okay, dig it.

i went into a local branch of  "Coconuts" and bought fear factory's "soul of a new machine" and alien ant farm's "anthology".

when i got home, i listened to them, and decided that i didn't like them at all.

so i read my receipt. it said that music could only be returned if it was unopened.

now, i understand that. i realize that i opened the cds. but how was i supposed to know if i liked the whole album unless i opened them and listened to them?!

so, i called them and said "i want to return some music i bought there earlier today." and whoever i was speaking to said "did you open them? did you say you want a refund?" and i said "no, i understand your return policy. i don't want any money back. i simply refuse to own these two albums."

and he said "uhhhh.... okay?"

and i did. i walked in and handed them to the guy at the counter. and we went through the same thing.

"you want a refund? we can't refund your money because these are opened."

so i told him what i had already said to the person on the phone.

"i don't want money. i just don't want to own these albums."

so when i got home, i decided to call their supervisor, and inform him of my side of the situation.

i said "listen, i returned the cds. i don't want money. all i want you to know is that i dislike your return policy, and for that reason, i will no longer purchase music, or movies there."

and he's all "look, it's a corperate thing. there's nothing we can do about it."

and i replied "and i understand that, and i respect that. however, i think it would be smarter for you, on a local level, to take the loss. after all, in the last three weeks i have purchased nearly $50 worth of merchandise from you on a weekly basis, and in the past year, i've spent nearly $300 on merchandise here. and if you refuse to do something about this situation, i will no longer patronize your establishment."

i shit you not. i was this cold, calculated, and concise. it surprised me.

"and furthermore," i said "i will inform my friends of your return policy, and that will certainly weigh on their decision whether or not to purchase things at your store, in the future."

and that was that.

they couldn't just be all hush-hush, and take a $40 loss on a local level, to ensure my future patronage of their fucking record store.

so, ladies and gentlemen, if you disagree with their return policy as strongly as i do, i urge you to boycott their nationwide chain, and pass this information along to your friends as well.

it doesn't hurt to be an informed consumer.

i just wish i had asked about their returns policy before i risked my hard earned cash.

and that's why i'm passing this information along to the rest of you.

make the decision that's right for you.

Every music store I've been to has had the same return policy. No big deal. You chose to buy the music. Quit your bitching.

no.

that return policy is retarded. period.

and what you call "bitching" is what i call "spreading information".

i think this is the only record store i've ever bought from that has this policy.

(Edited by JuggleFoe at 10:41 pm on Aug. 17, 2001)

Weenie.

All music stores I've bought from have that exact same policy.  
And I sympathize with your agony. I bought "The Dark Side of The Moon" from Pink Floyd when I meant to buy "Wish You Were Here" (this of course being before my knowledge of Floyd) and didn't like it at all. And I wanted to return it but no, I had already opened it and they refused to take it back.

Instead of giving it back, I sold it to someone else. Then I bought it back later after my taste in music changed a bit.

Weenie.

Alright Foe, I apologize. I'm sorry I called your boycott a weenie column. I didn't mean it.

likely story.

I stopped buying music and whatnot at Coconuts years ago. The charge too much and barely had anything listenable there back then. I doubt a store like that has any value for me now.

yeah, get this: the alien ant farm album was on sale at $13.99, and the fear factory album, which is pretty fuckin' old (they've put out three albums since then) was like $17!

what the fuck?!

and why can't they take back products that have had the shrinkwrap removed?

like they can't just re-shrink wrap it?!

basically, what they're saying is, if you get home, and you realize that you bought the wrong cd, or you realize that the case is defective somehow, you can return it.

but you're up shit creek without a paddle if you decide that you're not satisfied with your purchase?!

goddamn.

i'm still stuck on this whole "giving up $40 is the end of the world" thing. fuck all. i would have gone back to buy another $40 worth of music the following goddamned week anyhow!

son of a bitch!

Quote: from Fallen on 10:37 pm on Aug. 17, 2001
Every music store I've been to has had the same return policy. No big deal. You chose to buy the music. Quit your bitching.

so, what do you do when you don't think what you'ce purchased is worth the 4.3 hours of your life it took to earn the money that you used to purchase those albums?

sit back and take it up the ass, and come back, smiling for more?

that's exactly what they want you to do.

like i said earlier, they could fucking care less whether you're satisfied with your purchase or not.

i'm not saying we should launch a fucking jihad on them or something. i'm just saying, if you have a problem with a return policy that doesn't even take your satisfaction as a customer into account, you might want to think twice about purchasing things from this chain.

Why would they care?

I've never been to a Coconuts. They do not have them here.

Of course, they do not have even Wal-marts here. But the dollar stores! The dollar stores!

Loved your attitude and behaviour Foe! That's the way it should be. So the AAF album sucked, huh...Smooth criminal sounded nice.

You know, here only girls have such balls as you. I shit you not. From the people I know, more girls then guys would do that.

Quote: from Fallen on 4:06 am on Aug. 18, 2001
Why would they care?

like i've said, numerous times: if they'd just taken the loss, and i had left their store a happy consumer, and then i'd have gone back just about every week to make more purchases.

i think i'm going to keep a running tally of exactly how much money i spend at other record stores, just so you realize the impact, here.

i mean, i know i'm not going to put them out of business or something crazy like that, but i really think you're failing to see the point of this whole thing.

it's a little concept called "customer satisfaction".

this is something a company should do everything within it's grasp to ensure, as to ensure that you come back in the future.

But if they see it as more of a loss than a gain, then no...they wouldn't care.

People could take home the cd's, and make copies of them. Return them and have the money put back into their pocket.

I'm not saying that they shouldn't change their policy, or their policy is fucking terrific but looking at it from other points of view, it is kind of logical.

Huh.  I like "Soul Of A New Machine" a lot, actually.  Kinda repetitive, but c'mon: "Martyr", "Self-Immolation", "Scapegoat"...all great songs.

As for the Alien Ant Farm, I saw ten seconds of a video of theirs the other day.  I can appreciate puns as much as the next guy (I've seen Weird Al in concert four times, fer chrissakes), but I don't think I could bring myself to buy a debut album called "Anthology".

As for the more substantial elements of this thread...

I love the idea of just refusing to allow an album to reside in your home.

I can see their point: think of how quickly you could take a CD home, burn it, and return it.

Do they have a listening booth at the store?  The new CD store I buy most of my stuff from will let you listen to any album you're thinking about buying, not just their top-selling ones.  It's a great idea: I've decided to buy records I wasn't sure about, and have saved myself from wasting money on a couple of clunkers.  I'd try to find a store that has a similar policy in effect.