It's getting dangerous

Somebody else is gaining momentum, and today she was over my baby. From my sentiments point of view. This is a very very powerful crush, or whatever it is. But since it's so important, I didn't dismiss my feelings right away. In fact I talekd to both of them one after the other...It's strange. I asked my baby for Ionela 's number!! so I'd SMS her and wish her good luck for the presentation tomorrow. I didn't right away, and after a couple of hours I was talking to my baby and she asked if I'd callen Ionela. "No" "Oh, by the way, why did you want to cal her in the first place?" (as you know, she is already sensitive to the Ionela subject). "Tow ish her good luck". "Hum, why do you have to do that?" and in that very second the power went out here...Only the phone worked...But suddenly the TV, mircowave, computer, the entire block went in the dark. I made fun of my baby for that, telling her that she shouldn't have gotten so upset. Anyway, i lay int he dark and thought, not being able to do anything else. And I wanted to see who'd make me feel better. I called my baby, but it ended in like five minutes, she was busy working on her presentation. So Ic alled Ionela and talked and laughed with her for like 20 minutes...Even if she was sick. Whatever. I hope that Foe and Sorrow are right that this will pass with time...Or else...

This was suprising! My heart suddenly got very light after this phone conversation! Ah, the pressure if off! What the hell...This is sorta dissapointing..What the hell was this? A tornado, what? It seems as if it passed as fast as it came. Or  is this the silence before another storm?

Whatever.

Man..... I feel for you so much right now Amor, and there is nothing I can say to make it better, no magic sponge to wash the pain away, but I can say this to you.... although life is not a fairy tale, it will all come out well in the end.....

Now there's that positive thinking I mentioned in the other thread...

Thanks Mags Hope you're right. I am calmer now...Tomorrow though I will see Ionela at school and baby will come, and it's the first time I'm not that eager for that to happen, because I need to be alone and think, and she will sense that something's bothering me...

(Edited by Amor Fati at 1:33 pm on Sep. 4, 2001)

My little heart aches for you, and I really pray that your world turns right way up soon....

"Little heart"? You don't know what you're talking about
I hope that too. The normal thing would be for this to die down and things to be back like they were a few days ago.
But then again...I can't dismiss such strong feelings...

How about you? Can you give me some good news about you and Daniel?

No news you havent heard..... was round his house last wednesday, and we were lying in his garden in the sun, in the hammock (from the story?), but this time, lying like we do on my bed, not top to toe...

then we wnet inside and were lying on his sofa watching tv, with him behind me, his arms around me, and I swear, I nearly fell asleep like that (a fatigue thing, I'm going to the doctors about it), but I was so comfortable.....

However, I havn't heard from him since damnit.... and I'm back to college tommorow, and a different college from him (different county actually), so goodness knows when I will see him next

Thats all I have to report for now, sorry there is not more good news, there doesnt seem to be in my life at the moment....

Different college? That's not good..But I know hoe you feel..Since college ended for me, Ionela will be at a different everything!
So that "quality time" we were talking about will be hard to spend together...

Yeh, that does make it difficult....

I feel like I'm stuck in a holding pattern, almost a rut (albiet a nice rut) with Daniel at the moment, and I don't think the long absence will help, although it will make time with him all that more special....

I'm off now, early start tommorow, catch you then.... bye!

"Absence makes the heart grow fonder"
Nighty night Mags!