The Big Picture | To Let You In On It...

As someone who has lost every sense of family in the past year, I can only tell you that not having their support serves to make you independent in a way that is usually to soon but always much needed. We went throught it all - death, drugs, suicide, running away, the police, breaking the law, jail...all in my A Level year. My sister was in court when I was taking my final exams.

I never once let them see me cry. And I did, quite a bit,  but I found someone to confide in.

So yes, it's horrible and painful and it made me want to end my life, of all things - but things do get better. Your periods of feeling low get shorter and your highs become longer, as the situation around you stabilises [if not improves]. Even if it doesn't, you learnt to cope. I don't know how, but let's just say, the human mind is nothing short of a miracle.

As far as "being in control" of college - my one piece of advice is, if you don't like a subject, make sure you give it up. Please. I was lumbered with something I hated for two fucking years, and it caused me nothing but problems.