---(+ Holy Buffalo +)---
There's lots of space to roam..
» back to ---(+ Holy Buffalo +)---
IkonTalk
|
Profile
|
Lost Password
|
Active Users
|
Members
|
Avatars
|
Help
|
Search
» Welcome Guest:
log in
---(+ Holy Buffalo +)---
The Prairie
Editing post in
Topic: The Broken Mirror Gives A Truer Reflection On Me
Username
Are you registered?
Password
Forgotten your password?
Post
HTML is
off
for this forum
IkonCode is
on
for this forum
Emoticons are enabled
Andale Mono
Arial
Arial Black
Book Antiqua
Century Gothic
Comic Sans MS
Courier New
Georgia
Impact
Tahoma
Times New Roman
Trebuchet MS
Script MT Bold
Stencil
Verdana
Lucida Console
-2
-1
1
2
3
4
5
6
White
Black
Red
Yellow
Pink
Green
Orange
Purple
Blue
Beige
Brown
Teal
Navy
Maroon
LimeGreen
I know there must be good times ahead... but I've been living in this shadow for over three years now.... before 'he' even came onto the scene. I always was the eternal optimist, and still want to be, but it's difficult. Time was religion would help me (am I being clechied?), but now I look at the world, and wonder how I can see God there? I want to let him be part of my life, but at the moment even I don't want to be part of it. I need, shallow as it seems, a subsient solution. I do count my blessings every day, my fantastic family, my wonderful wonderful friends, all the beautiful things in my life, and in the world. And I know these far outweigh the bad, but I can't helping taking this all to heart... all the evil in the world, the wrong, the pain and cry, weep that I cannot change it. And I have begun to hate myself. I hate myself from frustration at my inadequacy. I hate myself for letting little things (and little people) get to me, and not being the stronger person. I hate myself for being jelous of those who are happy, especially those who are close to me. I feel selfish. I hate myself for being self pitying. I hate myself for not being able to be happy, for not letting contentment be enough. I know happiness will find me someday, but why does it have to be so dark before the light?
Post Options
Do you wish to add your signature?
Do you wish to
enable
emoticons in this post?
Do you wish to preview before posting?
Yes
No
Administration Options
Delete this post? Administration/Forum Moderator only
© 2001 - May 2006 holybuffalo.com, Aug 2006 - Present holybuffalo.net |
Our Privacy Statement
Powered by
Ikonboard 2.1.9 Beta
© 2001 Ikonboard.com